To All You Gilmore Girl Lovers {And The Rest Of You, Too...}

Now, onward with the girls caffeinated wit and wisdom...

The Pilot Episode - Opening Dialogue

Lorelai walks past a sign that says "Stars Hollow Founded 1779" and crosses the street. She goes into Luke's coffee shop. She takes off her coat and walks up to the counter, coffee cup in hand.

Lorelai: Please, Luke. Please, please, please.
Luke: How many cups have you had this morning?
Lorelai: None.
Luke: Plus...
Lorelai: Five, but yours is better.
Luke: You have a problem.
Lorelai: Yes, I do.
Luke pours her coffee.
Luke: Junkie.
Lorelai: Angel. You've got wings, baby.
A man watches Lorelai drink her coffee, then walks over to her.
Joey: You make that look really good.
Lorelai: Oh it is really good. It's the best coffee in town.
Joey: Oh yeah? I'll have to get a cup.
Lorelai: Good plan.

Lorelai: Sorry and I will get you some coffee.
Lorelai takes a coffee cup up to Luke, who gives her a stare...
Lorelai: What? It's not for me. It's for Rory, I swear.
Luke: You're shameless.

Luke: So what'll you have?
Lorelai: Coffee, in a vat.
Rory: I'll have coffee also. And chili fries.
Luke: That's quite a refined palate you got there.

Luke: Coffee, fries. I can't stand it. This is so unhealthy. Rory, put down that coffee. You do not want to grow up to be like your mom.
Rory: Sorry, too late.

The Lorelais' First Day at Chilton

Lorelai: I already had the longest day of my life and it's only ten o'clock.
Luke: There's no coffee.
Lorelai: That's not funny.
Luke: I can give you herbal tea.
Lorelai: This is not an herbal tea morning. This is a coffee morning.
Luke: Every morning for you is a coffee morning.
Lorelai: This is a jumbo coffee morning. I need coffee in an I.V.
Luke: I can give you tea and a balance bar.
Lorelai: Please, please, please tell me you're kidding.
Luke: I'm kidding.
Lorelai: You're sick.
Luke: Yep.
Lorelai: You're a fiend!
Luke: For here or to go.
Lorelai: To go please.
Luke: You want to know what this stuff does to your nervous system?
Lorelai: Do you have a chart? Because I love charts.

Lorelai: Still hugging, still hugging. So, I brought us some coffee.
Rory: Why, I'm shocked.
Lorelai: Triple caps, easy foam. If that doesn't work, we'll stick our fingers in a light socket.

The Deer Hunters

Lorelai: Sookie, I need coffee to go.
Sookie: There’s fresh over there.
Lorelai: Ooh, good. She glances at the pot
Lorelai: Fresh in my first lifetime as Joan of Arc.
Sookie: Oh sorry. I thought I made fresh. Here.
Lorelai: Bless you. I’m so exhausted and I have to drive into Hartford tonight to go to a parent/teacher meeting.

Lorelai: Mmm. Jesus, Mary, Joseph and a camel. This is really bad coffee.

Max: You know, I think this would be a good time for a break. There’s coffee in the back.

Lorelai: So, it was nice meeting you.
Max: You too.
Lorelai: Um, keep up the good work.
Max: I will.
Lorelai: Don’t ever make coffee ever again.

Cinnamon's Wake

Max: Okay, Okay, um, how about coffee? Do you like coffee?
Lorelai: Only with my oxygen.
Max: Can we drink some together? A sort of a pre-date, very casual, no strings, no obligations. We’ll just see if it’s even worth going down the road of including food in the deal. Just coffee? Decaf? Oh, there’s nothing safer than decaf.
Lorelai: I’m gonna be in town tomorrow because I’m taking a class at Hartford State and there’s a coffee shop across the street that I sometimes, almost all the time go to around 4:00, usually exactly 4:12. I could not stop a person from entering said establishment around that time, nor would I avoid them if I knew them, if they did.

Lorelai: Absolutely. What are you drinking?
Max: Coffee.
Lorelai: Plain coffee?
Max: Well I wanted some cream but that prompted a very elaborate foam conversation, and the look of disapproval I got when I said I didn’t want foam just cream rivaled the one I got from my dad when I told him I wanted to be a teacher.

Lorelai: I met this amazing guy.
Sookie: Goody!
Lorelai: Yeah, there’s goody stuff about it and there’s baddy stuff too. He’s a teacher at Chilton, Max. You met him at the bake sale.
Sookie: Oh - he looked good.
Lorelai: Yeah, right. He’s so sexy and smart and funny and he likes coffee.
Sookie: God, he sounds perfect for you.

Rory's Birthday Parties

Emily: How long have you been seeing him?
Lorelai: Luke? I'm not seeing Luke. He's just a friend.
Emily: Mm-hmm.
Lorelai: Mom, I swear. Luke keeps me in coffee, nothing else.

Kiss and Tell

Lorelai: Excuse me, can we get some coffee please?
Rory: And a muffin?
Lorelai: Warmed?
Taylor: This is the Autumn festival. Your show is right across the street from the Horn of Plenty! You're right smack dab in the middle of everything. You have to decorate.
Luke: I don't have to do anything but serve food.
Lorelai: And coffee!
Rory: And muffins!
Luke: Taylor, I'm tired of having this conversation with you every year.

Lorelai: I need coffee.
Rory: Mom, the video store closes in ten minutes.
Lorelai: Well, you run to the video store and I'll go get coffee.
Rory: Fine.

Love and War and Snow

Rory:You, me, donuts, coffee, standing out in a snowstorm.
Lorelai: At midnight?
Rory: At midnight.
Lorelai: You are my favorite daughter!

Luke: Here.
Harry: What is this?
Luke: I brought you coffee.
Harry: No, thank you.
Luke: Harry, you're freezing. Take the damn coffee.
Harry: When our forefathers stood out here many moons ago, they didn't have any coffee.
Luke: How do you know? Do you have written documentation about what sort of beverages they did or did not have on that long historic night of standing?
Harry: This is still a joke to you, young man. I don't choose to be a joke. We don't need your coffee.
Luke: Harry, please, take the coffee. My father would've taken the coffee.
Harry: Well, all right then, thank you.

Lorelai: I mean, I've dated, and you know, dated, but I've just never dated, here in our house.
Max: What if I promised you that if you let me in, all I'm expecting is a cup of coffee. That's it. Nothing weird or funny. Unless of course you're into weird and funny.

Lorelai: How strong do you like your coffee, because I've built up such a tolerance to it I usually make it too intense for most people.
Max: Yeah, yeah, I've lived through the fiesta burger, don't hold back now.
Lorelai: Okay.
Max: Can I help?
Lorelai: Um, yeah, you can fill up the pot.
Max: Oh, I'm very good at that. Six cups sounds good?
Lorelai: Fine, what are you gonna have?

Forgiveness and Stuff

Rory: I’d like to do something.
Lorelai: Like rollerblade?
Rory: Like get some coffee or make phone calls or do something that isn’t standing here waiting.
Lorelai: Okay, go it. Well as partial as I am to the phone, I’m voting for the ‘get coffee’ idea.

Rory: The coffee machine was jammed, so I got us some chicken soup and some Pez.

Lorelai: I’m not avoiding anything. I’m going to find coffee.
Luke: The machine’s jammed.
Lorelai: Well there are other machines.

Rory: No luck?
Lorelai: I think I’m wearing it down.
Rory: You’re pathetic.

Emily: There you are, where have you been?
Lorelai: Coffee hunt. So what’s going on?